As some of you know from this blog or day to day interactions with our family, Jayden has been the light and joy of our lives! He keeps us on our toes, challenges our parenting skills - or what we think are parenting skills - and makes us laugh and love him more then we can express! He has always been so very special and often makes us wonder what he will become one day when he's all grown up and on his own. It's no secret that Jayden was a tough little one. He was colicy, high-needs, always wanting to be held. He did not sleep through the night until he was 16 months old. He breastfeed until recently at around 22 months, and requires a lot of both me and Matt. That's not to say that every child requires a lot of their parents, but Jayden is really good at needing someone ALL the time! :) Regardless of how difficult some of this time has been, I wouldn't change one minute of it for anything in the world. I love Jayden for who he is and have loved being his mom from the very start. God blessed us with such a beautiful, healthy, sensitive, caring, independent, and loving little man.
Now, that being said, I would be lying if I didn't tell you how terrified I am at bringing another kiddo into the equation. In fact, I talk to Matt all the time about what he thinks our lives will be like. I know that there are families all over the world who have 2, 3, 4 plus kids in their home at the same time and all in a row. They all survive and go on to figure out this parenting-more-than-one-kid-at-a-time, thing. It does exist. But, do those families have a Jayden?!
In the beginning, I anticipate chaos, but at least I'll have my wonderful husband home for a couple weeks. My mom will then come in for an additional 3 weeks, and I'm sure we'll have a few more out of town family visitors to help make things more smooth. But at some point, I'm going to have to be alone with 2 kids! The breastfeeding thing makes me a bit nervous as well - only because I remember how much time I spent trying to figure it out with Jayden for the first few months. It seemed like all I was, was a milk making machine. We'd nurse for what seemed like 45 minutes to an hour every time. I'd cry, maybe sleep for a minute and we'd nurse all over again - constantly, around the clock, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. How does nursing on that schedule work with an almost 2 year old who takes one nap? Ahh! This is going to be fun!
Besides for the breastfeeding, Matt and I practice attachment parenting. How does that work with 2 kids? I have loved the parenting style that we seemed to have adopted, but it's no secret that it can be exhausting. Co-sleeping, nursing on demand, baby wearing, cloth diapering, not sleep training - pretty much craziness! Let's just pick the most difficult way to parent and see how sane we are in the end. AP revolves around meeting the immediate needs of our little ones, and I readily admit that it can make you a little nuts while you're in it! So, let's start taking bets on who is going to loose their mind first - me or Matt?!
As terrified as I am, I know we will eventually get into a routine of some sort and life will feel "normal" again - like it does now. We have an amazing little sleeper and overall a very well-adjusted happy toddler. I know we can get here again, someday! In the meantime, I should probably take one thing at a time as it comes. The reality is getting this baby out of me is the immediate need. For those of you that remember Jayden's crazy quick, intense, and no time for any relief labor, I hope to have a much calmer story this time around. We'll see what sense of humor God has with this next one!
