A Mama of Three

It's a beautiful Mother's Day morning in the Spaetzel household. Little man is sleeping in and Isabella is in my arms cooing and smiling big! I'm thankful and blessed beyond measure for what God has given me in this life. Everyday, I wake up and my heart is filled with happiness and love. I am married to a beautiful man filled with integrity and selflessness. He takes care of me and loves me more than words can express. I have two gorgeous children who call me mom, and that makes my heart melt everyday. It can be challenging at times and can definitely test every ounce of patience that God gave me, but it's truly a gift from above. I am honored that I get to be the mama to my beautiful Jayden Matthew and Isabella Rose.

 

As you may or may not know, I have another beautiful baby in this world. His name is Andrew and he is already 11 years old as of this past March. During my college years, I was faced with the most challenging time in my life - an unplanned pregnancy. I spent every second of that 9 months praying to God for answers of what I was to do. You see, I have always wanted to be a mom. I always loved babies and children and knew that I would be a mother - one day. I had no idea how much Andrew would change my life once I found out he was growing inside me. After months of seeing a counselor and going back and forth with my choice, I finally made a heartbreaking decision. Sitting in the hospital with my mom and my pregnancy counselor, I made a plan to place Andrew for adoption. This perfect baby who was a few hours old would be someone else's perfect baby to love and raise forever. After taking Andrew home for 6 weeks, nursing him and just loving every minute with him, I found an amazing family whom I knew God had placed into my life to become Andrew's parents.

Although forever in my mind and heart, that is not the story I think about today. The story I celebrate in my heart today is from last summer.  The story of Jayden and Andrew meeting for the very first time. Tears fill my eyes as I think about that day. Every summer, Andrew's family and mine get together to visit and spend some quality time with one another. The first year I had Jayden, Matt and I were unable to meet up with Andrew's family due to conflicting schedules. With them living in Michigan and Matt and I living in Arizona, we do our very best to make it happen each year.

That cloudy Ohio morning, we woke up at Matt's brother's home and packed the car to dive to Toledo with plans to meet at a science center. I remember being filled with many emotions as I talked through it all with Matt on our drive over. What would Andrew think of Jayden? Would he feel angry with me as I now had another baby? Oh how much I hoped for the start of a wonderful relationship between Andrew and Jayden. My worries, anxieties and fears were put on hold the moment I saw my 11 year old birthson. He was beautiful and, wow, big. I remember holding him as a newborn, so every year it always amazes me how much he changes.

Needless to say, the day was perfect! Andrew and I enjoyed some time together playing in one of the science center exhibits and just talking. We had lunch with the whole family and laughed about memories of Andrew at Jayden's age. Matt and I spent time with Andrew's little brother Daniel, who also stole our hearts. I remember thinking, I don't want this day to ever end.

As for what Andrew thought of Jayden, well, I'll leave you with these pictures:

 

What a joyful soul little Andrew has! He took Jayden under his wing and just loved on him. It always amazes me how God knows the perfect plans for us, even when we cannot possibly see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Thank you God for revealing just how perfect your plans always are! My heart is filled and I celebrate this Mother's day with appreciation and an overwhelming love for all three of my babies.

A Two-Year-Old, a Newborn, and One Inexperienced Mama!

Once again, it's been way too long since I've blogged. I thought that it would be easier to blog now that I'm a stay at home mama- ha, boy was I wrong! Life with two has been crazy, fun, insane, interesting, hilarious, chaotic, challenging, and absolutely perfect!

Isabella Rose Spaetzel was born on January 30th and 3:24 pm. She weighed in at a whopping 9lbs 6oz and 21 inches. It's no wonder I was so miserable at the end of my pregnancy. This girl was not playing around - she was planning on filling up every inch of my uterus before making her grand entrance into the world. And we are all so in love with her! Labor lasted about 8 hours and I made it to 8cm before giving in to the epidural. 2 hours later, she arrived!

Jayden has taken some time to adjust, but he is doing well. He loves to mimic the sounds baby Izzy makes, and thinks it fun to hold her, laugh and talk really close to her face, and give her hugs and kisses. He really is so sweet with her and I'm happy to see him doing well with her. I was so stressed about how much his life would change when she arrived. I would talk to Matt about how guilty I felt changing Jayden's little world. Turns out, things are starting to feel like the new normal for us all, which is such a relief.

As for being mom to two little ones, I would be lying if I didn't say it's been a challenge in ways I would have never imagined. I went into it knowing it would be tough, but there are definitely days where I feel like crying along with my two kids. Some days, I live for that nap time.

Last week, we were having a particularly rough morning and by nap time, both kids were completely falling apart. All I could do was laugh since it was such an out of control moment for me. I ended up laying on the couch with Isabella by my side attempting to nurse her, while Jayden was hanging on top of me crying at the top of his lungs. He insisted that I hold him and was making sure to let it be known just how upset he was when I could not. After realizing that nursing was not what Izzy was interested in, I just held them both and started singing a song as they proceeded to loose their minds. I have no doubt we will have more moments like these in the year to come, so in the meantime, all I can do is laugh (or cry) and make the best of each moment. :)

Little Isabella has been such a sweet baby these past 6 weeks. It truly is amazing the difference in each child's personality. Jayden was our high-needs baby, who's needs were often exhausting beyond that of a "typical" newborn.  However, we learned his personality and figured out how to make life work for all of us. Isabella is the complete opposite. Other than having acid reflux (poor little one), she is pretty easygoing, does not need to be held every minute of the day, and already loves to smile and coo when we talk to her. Don't get me wrong, she has her moments, but overall, God blessed us with a laid-back little one. It's a good thing too, because my beautiful baby Jayden is still the firecracker that he has always been.

There is no question that our attachment parenting style is still the way to go for our family. Isabella sleeps snuggled up with me every night and is therefore able to nurse whenever the need arises. I often have her in the wrap, which is also practical since I have Jayden to play with and run after. No doubt that she is happiest in one of our arms, but she does do well in the swing or bouncy seat if I need to get Jayden ready for the day or just spend some time playing cars with him.

The nursing thing has been a little bit easier this time around, not to say I still didn't have some struggles. My milk still shoots out at lightning speed, causing all my babies to eat as fast at they possibly can, while trying not to gulp down too much air or cause the milk to go down the wrong pipe.  I know, sounds like fun. Also, remembering how to nurse my newborn was not as easy as I thought. Jayden nursed throughout most of my pregnancy, self-weaning around my 8th month. I remember thinking I would pick up nursing no problem since I'd been doing it for almost 2 years, but the first night in the hospital proved to be a bit of challenge with latching. Both Isabella and I eventually got the hang of it and are going strong week 6.

Oh how life has changed. Although Matt and I are severely sleep deprived, and I have days that I am counting down the hours until my husband comes home, we are so happy and blessed to have our babies and each other. I would not trade it for anything in the world. Of course, I may need a reminder of that statement as we get ready to enter into our crazy hot summers here in AZ. Oh to be trapped in the house everyday with a 2 year old and a new baby.  The adventure continues.